Content Warning: eating disorders, orthorexia, weight, body dysmorphic disorder, low self-esteem, perfectionism
What are you free from?
I am free from external self-worth.
What does ‘freedom’ mean to you?
Freedom means being unapologetically myself: body, mind, and spirit. It means not feeling the pull to do and be everything for everyone.
Share a bit of your story with us:
In my 20s, I felt like I was out of control, unsure where my life was heading. So I took control of my weight and eating. It turned into a seven-year battle with orthorexia, body dysmorphic disorder, and binge-eating disorder.
My worth became completely tied to my weight and how my body looked.
I physically felt like I was going through my days walking in quicksand, and all I could think about was food.
It wasn’t until I started listening to podcasts about eating disorders and intuitive eating that I realized I had a problem and wasn’t alone or crazy.
Five months after my son was born, a few years after I had recovered, I decided to create Freedom with Food and Fitness. It is an online community that helps women heal their relationships with food, weight, and their bodies. My mission is to help women not go through what I went through.
How would you compare your life before finding freedom from “the opinions of others” to your life after?
My self-worth isn’t dependent on how I look now. I don’t beat myself up as much and have much more self-compassion. I also have the mindset to work to heal my perfectionism.
I can dedicate brain space to things that matter significantly more than my body.
I don’t weigh myself, so that number no longer controls me.
I have more freedom to be spontaneous and have fun.
I enjoy social events without the anxiety of what to eat and how much. I feel more solid in who I am as a person and what makes me special. I also have more compassion for those in different bodies and their struggles.
What message do you have for others who can relate?
It is 100% possible to heal, no matter how long you’ve been suffering, no matter your story. We all have our reasons for being sick, but there are ways to heal the most difficult of traumas.
Surround yourself with like-minded people who have gone through recovery.
The community out here is so supportive and vulnerable with their own stories.
