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I’d like to start with 4 words: Transformation. Reinvention. Improvement. Renovation.
Let them roll around in your head. Sometimes in life we find the need to better ourselves. Of course, it’s always important to better ourselves, but there are times when improvement becomes the main focus.
Wanting to change doesn’t mean you’re not good enough.
It doesn’t mean you have to be perfect. Sometimes it’s just important to start over, to reinvent yourself, and to take a new direction.
There are many reasons when reinventing ourselves might come into play. One of those reasons is a tragic event. Another is hitting rock bottom. I know when I became a widow in 2014, I began to reinvent myself.
At first I didn’t realize I was reinventing myself. I was finding my “new normal.” I was adapting to my new life. In a lot of ways I was going through the motions. In other ways, I was trying to find the joy in what was left behind. Most times, it was easiest to turn to the person who knew me best: me.
In turning to me, I realized that the old me, though comforting, was just not going to be enough anymore. It didn’t mean I loved myself any less. It didn’t mean I wasn’t good enough. I was just different. I wasn’t the same.
And because I wasn’t the same, I needed to make a change.
Reinvention. A new beginning.
So it sounds pretty good, right? Maybe not easy, but it sounds like a plan. It was a plan. But having a plan doesn’t cut it. Having a plan is just the start of it all. Once you have a plan, what you need is motivation.
So how can you possibly motivate yourself to do something as overwhelming, difficult, and huge as starting over? Well, the first thing you do is tweak that phrase: starting over. We simply don’t start over.
Sometimes it feels that way. But it isn’t accurate.
You are not starting over. You may have lost something. Or something may have happened to you. Or you may be feeling completely alone. But you did not lose everything else you did or had. You don’t have to go back in time and do it over again. You don’t have to go through all the past parts of your life again. You don’t have to start them over.
Starting over is not what you have to do.
You did the work, you made my way, you accomplished things, you lived. Here you are, you got somewhere. And now you may have lost something, or reached your bottom, and you have to move forward from it. But, you do not have to start over.
What you have to do is learn to live a new life. Become a new you. And that is hard, but you can do it.
As Nelson Mandela said, “It always seems impossible until it is done.” It’s one of my favorite quotes and it always rings true for me. There have been times when I’ve wondered how I could get through each day, but it always seems impossible until it is done.
So stop overthinking, and just do. Let your old self be the guide for your new self. Inspire yourself. Cheer yourself on. And power through like there’s no tomorrow.
There is a tomorrow, and it is bright, awesome and ready for you.
Don’t make it wait too long.
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Arielle is an MSW, LSW, writer, and blogger. She is a Hospice Social Worker, widow, stepmomma, and wife. She has professional experience with eating disorders, domestic violence, grief and loss. She loves her work, her family, her cats, and her dog! She most often writes about grief, loss, end of life issues, and suicide. Gratitude fuels her every move.
SITE DISCLAIMER: The opinions and information shared in this article or any other Content on our site may not represent that of Libero Network Society. We hold no liability for any harm that may incur from reading content on our site. Please always consult your own medical professionals before making any changes to your medication, activities, or recovery process. Libero does not provide emergency support. If you are in crisis, please call 1-800-784-2433 or another helpline or 911.