Mental Health

Why I Write

Why I Write | Libero Magazine

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People take different roads seeking fulfillment and happiness. Just because they’re not on your road doesn’t mean they’ve gotten lost. -H. Jackson Browne

Just like every other six-year-old girl that knew how to write, I wanted a diary. I wanted a diary with a pretty picture (mine had cats on it) and of course, a lock. The lock was especially important because I did not want any prying eyes, namely my parents, reading the inner working of my six-year-old mind. I look back at my old diary now and laugh because a typical entry was: “Today I went to the park with mom.” I don’t know how I kept that secret locked away in that diary for so long without it eating me up inside!

After the diary stage, I very rarely wrote in a journal. I did, and still do, however, keep pretty much everything: concert tickets, brochures, game programs, photographs, birthday cards. So even though I did not personally log the goings-on of my life on paper, I do have records of a lot of things I do.

When I was in grade twelve though, my volleyball coach had our whole team keep a daily journal to log the things going on in our life and how they were affecting us. I had a tendency to carry my emotional things with me, and he thought that by writing them down, I could shed those things that were weighing me down and become a better volleyball player because I could play freely. I went crazy with that journal. Every day for about twenty days, I wrote three to four pages about what was going on. Granted, it was a bit of a rough time for me so there were quite a few things that I was working through. I have since read through that journal and I was shocked at how tough things were during that time. I realized that the people around me had absolutely no idea what I was going through because I never actually showed signs of the things taking their toll on me. I still do not know if that is a good or a bad thing. Maybe it was good because writing them down got things off my chest and I did not need to express them to anyone else. On the flip side, keeping things to myself might have been a bad thing. Either way, I really enjoyed writing them down.

That experience showed me that I enjoyed writing things down, so that’s what I did. I have numerous journals and pretty little books that have a few choice entries in them. Then I came across a problem. When I write with a pen, I lay my right had down on the page ahead of where I am writing. Issue: in little books, my hand goes off the page and my writing gets messy! Now, y’all know I’m an anal neat freak when it comes to writing and notes, so you know that just doesn’t work. Cue the blog! I have had an internet blog for quite some time now; I’ve just never made it very public.

But why “this” blog? Just over a year ago, my life did a 180-degree turn. I was going through things in my life, working towards a certain goal, surrounding myself with certain people. All of that came to a grinding halt at one point and I decided that I didn’t want to continue on the path I was headed. I like to think of it as a more fun, happier detour. I am still working towards the same goals in my life, I’m just going to get there a different way now. This blog is my attempt to log things that make me happy. I have discovered that it doesn’t matter what you’re doing in life so long as you are happy. I hope my musings can bring some smiles and happiness into your life too!

Taylor writes on relationships, depression, and general mental health.

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