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Life is the longest thing we know, yet it feels like the shortest. It seems like seconds go by and then you are fifty, yourself a parent, breathlessly wondering where the time went. Time is one thing we cannot gain back. I have been struggling with this for a long time. We often waste our time on things that seem so tremendously monumental at the moment, when really, what would it matter longer down the road?
As my Nana always says: “What will it matter in a hundred years?” Exactly.
May is my mom’s month: Mother’s Day and her birthday fall in the same month and we aptly name it “Leanne-fest” for a reason. As with most teenagers, my relationship with my mom is often punctuated by small fights, misunderstandings and being on completely separate pages from each other. But this is not the point of this post.
The point of it is to talk about how we only have a very limited time with our mom, and often we take that time for granted. You see, my family is cursed with the deadly grip of Dementia and Alzheimer’s. My great-grandma died with it and my grandma is going down the same path, but her progression is even quicker. The thing that bothers me the most about dementia is it takes away our most precious possession: time. Because as the days go by, my Nana is forgetting more and more. In a few years she will not know her own daughter, her grandchildren — all the things she holds most dear. And that truly breaks my heart.
Dementia destroys the relationships that are most important to us. The saying “mother knows best” is so true, yet what if you don’t even remember you are a mother? Time slips through your fingers like water and no matter how hard you try, you can’t even remember what you did an hour ago. Constantly I have to repeat myself over and over and over to my grandmother about what I did yesterday, where I work, and how I’m doing.
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In saying that, I just want to tell my mom: thank you from the bottom of my heart. No one else in this world will hold the title “Mom” to me. Wear that title with great pride, mom, knowing that you truly have the best job a person can ask for. It may be hard, but I wouldn’t change a second of our relationship. Ever. Because you are the person that knows me the best and you are the person whose interests are not selfish, but instead beautifully selfless. Thank you, thank you, thank you. You are the best mom a son could ever ask for.
My biggest fear is to see my mother fall prey to the same fate of Dementia. And it is this fear that leads me to the realization that we have such a limited time to spend on this earth with our mom; so please, do not take the time you share with her for granted.
You should honour your mom not only on Mother’s Day, but every day that you spend with her. And that doesn’t have to be a big show. A simple “I love you” can make her day. Because you never know when that time will end… It could be over in a blink of an eye.
So to all the moms out there: You are amazing people. And Happy Mother’s Day. No one can take on a job quite like yours, and you should be proud.
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