Originally published on VibrantMe.org on February 17, 2018. Republished here with permission. Get your blog featured!
That little green man called Jealousy has nothing on the lurking, insidious, other-worldly monster under the bed called Shame.
Brené Brown was the first person to properly introduce me to my Shame creature in a way that made me understand him as a separate entity to myself. Her words:
“Shame is the most powerful, master emotion. It’s the fear that we’re not good enough.”
As I explored Brené’s words, I began to understand that there was more to play here than I had ever thought.
My Eating Disorder eats at the same table as Shame, ironically devouring my Power and Self-Confidence for breakfast.
These friends meet with their colleague Fear later in the day to plot the best stories to feed into my susceptible brain in order to keep me ‘safe’ and under their control.
This is a plot that has continued within me for years. That is until I began to separate myself, my awareness, and my inner knowing from the harmful voices free flowing in my head.
I heard a statistic the other day that 90% of the thoughts we think are negative. That. Is. Insanity.
What do you think is at play here?
At the core, these mechanisms must be in place to keep us alive; after all, we are wired for survival. But what it means to survive is very different than what it means to thrive.
When we allow the monsters of Shame, Fear, Restriction, and Not-Enough-Ness, to run the show, we survive but we are miserable in the process.
We become weak and unable to invite Passion and Meaning to the table even when we are so hungry for connection.
I will leave you with another quote from Brené:
“You are imperfect, you are wired for struggle, but you are worthy of love and belonging.”
When you truly decide you no longer want to invite Shame and Fear into your mind, you make room for Love and Belonging to show up, to see you, and to share their stories of being courageously alive.
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