Depression

Taking a Mulligan

Mulligan | Libero Magazine

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Mulligan – A mulligan, in a game, happens when a player gets a second chance to perform a certain move or action. The practice is also sometimes referred to as a “do-over.”

I asked a friend tonight: if you could do one thing over from your time at University, what would it be? I asked him not to fixate upon what he regretted or about what his greatest failure was or something like that. I was hoping to discuss something he wishes he could change and then how the thinks things would be different if he could.

I often think sometimes we blend regret and reflection together. On the one hand we should not regret things that have gone on in our life, but on the other. we need to reflect on and understand what has happened.

When you regret things (take this from someone who knows) it eats away at you – when you regret how you treated someone or how you acted or an event that went on… that is going to eat you from the inside out! Reflecting upon a decision and thinking how you could have done that differently is something different.

Let me explain, at a friend’s wedding I had a little too much wine to drink; mixed with lack of fluids and emotional distress created a bad mix. I was unable to drive home and my depression was amplified. Do I regret that decision to have a few glasses of wine? no. Do I regret having a few too many? no. Do I recognize that it was a stupid decision? Yes.

Well what did I learn?

I learned that:

1. I still go to a school where everyone cares about everyone and friends will  drive you home if you can’t drive yourself.

2. Do not drink when your facing emotional issues and/or struggling with depression.

3. Always plan ahead (i.e. designated driver, guys!)

 

Maybe that is not the best example but here is the one that happened tonight: I did not treat a friend the best. Do I regret what I did? no. Because I have learned to not let things eat me up. But I reflected, and I realize and I acknowledged that I cannot treat them like that again. See, I had to learn; and although it was not the best way of learning (because it left the other person hurt) it is still better to spend time reflecting rather than regretting. So I guess that was my my mulligan for today.

When I think about my depression it is easy to get caught up in thoughts of wishing it never happened: I wish that I did not have to go through that and I wish that people would understand. But these thoughts are in no way constructive. The truth is, I don’t regret my depression for a second. I reflect upon those days once in a while and they have given me a new appreciation for life!

When I was going through my depression (heading downward) I constantly was regretting things, thinking: Why did I do that? Why did I not get that done? Why have a lost motivation? etc… It is a tough process. The only thing I regret is that regretting phase! I do not regret what went on, instead I am trying to reflect on it and think through so that I do not have to face it again.

So I leave you with this… what is your mulligan?

If you have followed my blog thus far you will know I am trying to live life without regrets, it is tough, but you should try it too!!!

 

 

Christian struggled through and recovered from depression. He likes to write so others can hear his story and know there is hope. His goal is that through sharing, people will be able to see their story within his own.


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