Tomorrow is my brother’s wedding. My goal was to perfect intuitive eating over the last few months so that in the days leading up to (and the day of) the wedding I would not be preoccupied by feelings of guilt for not ‘eating right’ or discomfort from bingeing/compulsive overeating, or insecurity about my appearance (because I find that I am only insecure about my body when I am not feeding it right, whether or not its shape/size changes).
However, in the last few weeks I’ve had a lot of stress at work and I am sad to say I have resorted to old habits of compulsive overeating and this has led me to feelings of guilt, disappointment, and insecurity. And then it hit me – thinking about what my body could have been like or how I should have been eating is probably one of the most unproductive things I can do. Sure, I could’ve treated my body with more respect the last few weeks, but the reality is I didn’t. And so rather than look to how things could or should be and feeling insecure and guilty, I need to realize that this is my body today and there’s nothing I can do to change that. And this body deserves just as much love as the body I’d have if I hadn’t been compulsively overeating. And so I need to love it.
As soon as I realized this, my whole perspective changed. I no longer feel guilty for the way I’ve been eating (though I am aware it is unhealthy and I want to change) nor am I entertaining thoughts of insecurity. This is my body today and I will love it today and tomorrow and every day after that.
Remember to love your body today – not only will this make your life far more enjoyable, but it will also encourage you to treat it with gentleness and respect.
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